Hmmmm, so, continuing on. AND, this is part five, cause I was a duffus and didn�t realize that part three had already been posted. *chuckles* So, last night�s post was actually part four. *shrugs* So sue me.

Anyway... After the nearly 3/4 of a mile hike to the Market Place, through which I grumbled and whined the whole way, we stopped at a place called Oddessy Coffee. It�s a �booth� that�s up all the time. Now, me being the dorkus majorus that I am at times, I had chosen to wear my hottest garb on the hottest day of this Gulf Wars. *chuckles then takes a bow*

We stopped and I immediately propped up my leg a bit. Charles, STILL being a gentleman, offered to go get us lemonade. It was an offer I greatfully accepted. Not for the reason I accepted offers like that from my ex, but because I really wanted a glass of lemonade... or anything cool and wet. *smirks*

(My ex offered to get me stuff all the time... but I almost always accepted cause I just wanted him to go away for a while. Just to get a chance to breathe without him worrying about whether or not I was okay. *rolls her eyes*)

Ya know... this is the first time, in a very long time, when I actually missed someone when they were gone for only a few moments. *chuckles* Of course, I was also battling with that internal self-doubt thing. I figured I was a drain on Charles. That because I was slow, complaining and, in my opinion, petty... that he was gonna get real bored, real quick. And that he was gonna regret having invited me out. *laughs*

Of course, Charles was a gentleman in all aspects. If he ever FELT bored with me, he never once even hinted at it. *grins*

I was really surprised with myself. I mean, I�d been pretty good about walking almost every day... I�d gained a lot of mobility over the past six months. But still, I felt like such a complete weakling. I�m sure Charles could have gone for miles upon miles without even breathing hard. Me? Going to the bathroom left me breathless. Okay, granted, perhaps it was the smell of the port-a-potty that left me breathless... That�s irrelivant.

*smirks*

Next year, there are going to be a few differences about Gulf Wars. First off, I�m going to pre-register. And I�m going to do so with An Tir, my �kingdom�. There was a small camp site reserved for those An Tir-ians. But the An Tir camp site was up in the thick of things, so to speak. And only a hundred yards from the showers. If that.

Anyway... Next year I�m not going to twist my ankle. *chuckles* AND, next year, I�m going to be 100 lbs lighter. I guarantee that. I�m not going to another event as heavy as I am. I would like to be able to walk from one side of the market place to the other without pain radiating through my back. *chuckles* I also want to pack lighter. Smaller body size means smaller clothing... less material. Woohoo.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway... For a moment, we just sat under the canopy at Oddessy coffee. I was both whiney and excited. Whiney for the obvious reasons, I was uncomfortable and the Ibuprofin hadn�t kicked in yet. Excited cause there was so much to look at. I saw people in Elizabethan garb, generic tunic and pants, Arabian gear, Highland Scotts gear... hell, I saw a few people in kilts. I was half tempted to ask if they were truly period, but I didn�t.

For that first day, I pretty much fussed and whined so much that I�m sure I was a tremendous downer to Charles. However, he still never let on.

We had dinner in the main hall, cafeteria style. I remember that the first day, they had �gumbo�. And I knew that all I knew about Gumbo was that I wasn�t gonna eat it. *chuckles* I don�t know what these folks put in it, but I didn�t try it. Charles said it wasn�t too bad. I figure he knows what he�s talking about. But, I�m of the opinion that if I can�t identify everything I�m eating... I�d best not be eating it. *smirks*

We spent a liesurely day up there... Charles looked around for some of the people he�d known from years past and I spent a lot of time sitting at Oddessy coffee. I tried telling Charles to go look and explore and shop and stuff, but he wouldn�t leave me. *chuckles*

I know I�m bringing that up a lot, but really... I just can�t get over it. That�s like... so completely unheard of for me. I know that there are probably some of you who think I�ve just lived my whole life in a box or something... And you�re not far wrong. *smirks* But still... I�m amazed that Charles would continuously sacrifice his enjoyment not out of a sense of worry that I might break and shatter, or that I was too weak to be by myself... but because as a chivalric gentleman... He wasn�t going to leave me to fend for myself.

*laughs at herself, but is still amazed*

Anyway... We looked at a few shops, but I was being a baby and didn�t want to move much. And I kept expecting Charles to just give up on me or something. He didn�t. Eventually he did look around at some of the shops by himself, but he wasn�t gone for long. And when he came back, he didn�t look at me like I was a fragile child unable to think or remain alone.

He actually looked like he was concerned about my well being because of my ankle. *chuckles* That�s something I�ve never experience before either. Someone being concerned because of the injury. Don�t get me wrong, I�ve had people concerned about injuries of mine, but most of the time it seems they�re concerned because they think I can�t handle being injured.

*shrugs*

Regardless... after a while, we made the long trek back to camp. I still feel like I was whining and complaining too much. Granted, the ankle hurt, but it�s not like I actually broke anything. I didn�t break any bones and I didn�t cut anything. Therefore, there was no reason, whatsoever, for me to be so fussy. But, Charles never once showed distaste. He didn�t complain about my foolish attitude. None of that.

I kept saying that the ankle would be fine the next day. After we�d gotten back to the camp site, Charles set up one of the free chairs for me to prop my foot up on. I didn�t want him to pander to me.

I really didn�t want him to be drained or hindered by me, so it�s possible that I wasn�t as fussy as I think I was. But I felt fussy. I felt like I was whining and whimpering at everything. Dunno, I just felt, to my own �ears� as if I were pissy the whole day. I haven�t had the guts to actually ask Charles if I was pissy or not, cause I don�t want to know that I caused him trouble. *chuckles*

But, we had dinner at the camp site... my favorite meal. We had fresh bread, summer sausage, cheese and dried fruit. It�s a very healthy meal without being �health food�. We talked a bit, about lots of different things.

Before I�d flown out, I�d thought about different things we could talk about. I forgot all of them. *laughs* I felt... *frowns in thought* free. I wasn�t restricted by family. I wasn�t restricted in what I could talk about. Charles and I have been acquainted via the �Net for three plus years. But our friendship hadn�t really taken root until last Spring.

We talked about Charles� job and the duffusi (the �Tiger-ized� plural of Duffus) he�s had to deal with. We talked about family and friends and the different events we wanted to see. *laughs* It just felt so.... clean there. So uncomplicated.

I believe that was partially because of being out in the open where there was no real industry anywhere near. It was partially because I knew I had absolutely nothing to fear with Charles. And partially because I knew that he wouldn�t ever laugh at me for my ideas or thoughts. I didn�t ever feel stupid.

But, I did feel the need to do that two-block I-really-gotta-go-potty thing a few times. Each time, Charles would walk with me. And again, I feel it necessary to state that his companionship was not due to his thoughts that I might be incapable of walking by myself. I don�t really say this stuff so much for you readers, but for myself. I type it out so much cause I think of times in the future when I will re-read these specific entries. What can I say? Charles was a gentleman. Not just putting on an act, but he was a real gentleman. It�s a part of his character. His personality. I admire that.

That�s one of the things that I really enjoyed... But that gets in to the next day...

So, both Charles and I made that final trek up to the �facilities� and he walked me back. I went to bed and told Charles that he should go look around. It was still quite early in the evening and I thought he should go play. He finally agreed, since I was going to be sleeping anyway. I don�t know when he came back. My memory is a little hazy in that area. I fell asleep, hoping my ankle would be more polite the next morning. *chuckles*

As it turns out, My ankle didn�t hurt the next morning, and it wasn�t swollen, until I got back from my it�s-too-damned-early-in-the-morning-to-have-to-walk-to-the-bathrooms trip. I opened the door of the tent and heard Charles voice saying that if I was making a trip up to the facilities he would walk with me. I told him I was just coming back. He chuckled thinking for sure it had only been a second between the time that I unzipped the tent flap and stood up.

That�s what happens when you blink sometimes. *grins*

I don�t remember if he went for supplies on Wed...... Yeah, he did. I made up a short list of things we needed... one of which was an ankle brace. *chuckles* I told him to go cheap on that. There were some brands that were upwards of 15 bucks. I see absolutely no reason to spend that much on something that I�m only going to be wearing for a day or so (little did I know I�d injured my ankle worse than I thought).

Regardless... he was gonna be gone for a few hours. I told him that I would stay at the camp site, do bible study, write for a while, then grab a nap, cause I wasn�t really all that interested at getting up so damned early in the morning. And for those of you wondering... early was about 8. I don�t think I slept past 8:30 any day that I was out there. Camping, I mean.

So, Charles made the 80 mile hike to get the car.... *smirks* Yeah, so I�m exagerating. But I�m sure it felt like 80 miles. And I did some good bible study. I wrote about three paragraphs.

ya know... that�s what really surprised me. I�m used to writing pages and pages of stuff every day, and yet, I think I might have written two pages worth of stuff in the entire two weeks I was out there. I guess I didn�t need to process anything. I don�t know. I do usually write to process the things that are going on in my life. And I write when I�m angry, frustrated or confused. I wasn�t any of those things. That was cool.

So, Charles got back with the supplies. We unpacked the car and stowed everything, then got ready to go back up to where everything was happening. Wednesday I was less fussy, but I was also keeping a slightly tighter rein on it. Or rather, I think I was keeping a tighter rein on it. *shrugs*

Regardless... I got to ride in Charles� chariot up to the Market Place. *laughs* That was cool. I was spared the walk up. Woohoo. *laughs* I told Charles that I�d be at Oddessy Coffee after he got through taking the chariot back to it�s chariot spot. And, I told him to take his time coming back, that if he saw friends or something that caught his eye, that he should watch/explore.

He asked if I was sure. I, of course, was very sure. I told him that I was going to be watching the people as they moved past. It was so very interesting to see how everyone interacted. I told Charles that I wasn�t gonna do anything else to hurt myself and that I wasn�t gonna fall down. He told me that if I did have any trouble, and if I needed to get someone�s attention, that I should fall down in front of someone. *laughs*

I looked down at the outfit I was wearing and shook my head. Uh uh. The mustard-yellow (kinda dark tan with yellow undertones) would have stained. I was also wearing the dark green shawl I�d crochetted for myself. Damn, that thing was warm. It was so very comfortable.

Anyway, I said that I was gonna be people watching. And Charles finally agreed. So, I made my slow way to Oddessy Coffee, looking at a few of the swords and such as I went. They were so cool and I really wanted to get one, but I wasn�t gonna just go and plop down a bunch of money without knowing what I was getting.

Okay, I�m going to compact this a bit...

Charles got back to Oddessy Coffee and we then went in for lunch. I don�t remember what they had, but it was decent. I�ve had better, but I�ve also had a hell of a lot worse. *grins*

I believe we went to see the horses then. And that�s when we saw the little marker designating the An Tir camp site. It was really small. Like, our tent and dining canopies and such would have taken up easily half the space. *chuckles* Anyway, we wandered over to the horse area and got to see a few riders and their mounts.

The horses were stunningly beautiful. There were a few decked out in their colors and such.... Man, they were gorgeous. *sighs softly* Eventually, I�ll be able to ride again. Soon, actually. I�ll find a way. I so miss horse-back riding. *sighs*

Anyway... since there wasn�t a whole lot of activity there, we then moved on to see a couple battles. Now that was cool. We didn�t see the big fights until later in the week... but I got to watch a few one-on-one fights. Damn, that looked so cool. Of course, here I am in skirts and such and I�m really gettin into the whole fighting thing. *laughs at herself*

That�s such a conflict to me, ya know? Like, you don�t wear a dress and Harley boots. *laughs* It just doesn�t look right. And all you females who choose to wear skirts/dresses and Doc Martin�s or �combat� boots or whatever... that�s your gig. Do what you please. But me? Uh uh. Hell, I was extremely embarrassed to be wearing my high-top hiking boots.

But, that�s totally and completely beside the point. *laughs* I loved watching the fighting. Charles seemed to be a little bored with it, since they were just �pick up� fights. But I was intrigued. There were so many people in armor. And it looked so damned heavy. It really looked extremely heavy. I saw a few women out there too. Not a whole lot, but more than in past years, according to Charles.

I thought that was so cool. And yeah, I played with the idea of getting in shape, working out with blades and all and getting into the actual fighting... but no... I know that I�d get hit and I still have a few problems with that.

One of the things I thought was coolest about the battles, is that when someone got hit, they admitted it. I didn�t see anyone NOT admit he/she was hit. There wasn�t any bitching, fighting or squabling about how the hit didn�t count, or wasn�t hard enough, or was too hard. I didn�t hear any bitching about how someone wasn�t allowed to hit that way, or how someone wasn�t ready, or any of that whining, petty, complaining shit. It was so cool.

It did start raining on Wednesday. That was cool by me... Hell, I live in Washington where it rains a lot. But the thing that was so funny, was that we would be walking through the market place. Everyone was ducking for cover, either going into shops, or stopping at the food vendors. *laughs at herself* I was standing out in the rain, head tilted back, eyes closed, feeling the drops splash on my face. It felt so clear, so clean, so fresh, so alive.

And it wasn�t a freezing rain. it was cold, but not freezing. In my opinion, it was wonderful. I was actually standing out there, dancing in the rain. Just feeling it falling on me and swaying slowly, spinning once in a while, opening my arms to feel the rain cascading down over my face. *laughs at herself*

Some people looked at me like I was completely and utterly demented. *laughs* I don�t care. There was one shop keeper who grinned when I talked about loving the rain. I told him that I was used to it and liked it... that where I was from, it was wonderful. He grinned and said he understood that. *laughs*

I laughed with Charles about it too. He would look at me as we walked into a shop. He�d make room so I could get out of the rain and I just looked at him, grinned, and said that I wanted to feel it. He�d laugh at me. But it wasn�t a you�re-insane-and-I�m-just-humoring-you kind of laugh. (well, okay, maybe it was, but I wasn�t really paying that close attention) but it was more of a You�re-too-much kind of laugh.

*grins brightly* Damn, that was so much fun. People were scurrying for cover and there I was, luxuriating in the feel of each drop as it washed yet another problem, thought, pain away from me.

That�s how some kinds of rain are.

I looked at Charles as we were walking again and I told him that that was the kind of rain I really missed. That was the kind I�d written about in this diary... the kind that I�d often walked through up in Seattle, on Capitol Hill when I was attending Cornish. *laughs softly, a grin splitting her lips once again* Damn, I loved that.

I don�t think the event would have been half as spectacular if we hadn�t had that little sampling of rain.

BUT, then it turned mean. The feel of the rain changed. And a storm approached. a very, very not-nice storm. There were tornado warnings and all that. THAT scared me. A lot.

It�s kinda like... I can handle a 6.8 earthquake, but a tornado? no thanks. Especially when I�m camping out in the middle of the woods in Mississippi with no phone access. *shudders* The thoughts and fears were coursing through me.

In fact, when the lightning started, I was freakin out. I was sitting in my side of the tent, staring up at the sky through the rain fly. I was holding my tiger stuffie so tightly to my chest that I wouldn�t have been surprised if I�d left permanant indentations. *chuckles*

Charles remained calm throughout the whole thing. *shakes her head* I don�t know if my voice remained calm or not, but I sure as hell felt hysterical. Massively so. Hot damn, I was flippin terrified. Especially when the lightning cracked almost directly overhead. That flippin scared the shit out of me. Well, it would have if I hadn�t been so tense. *chuckles*

I love watching storms. BUT, I like watching them from the relative safety of a house. With solid walls between me and the big, huge trees all around us. I�d prefer a house to a tent for all storms in the future... just for reference.

As it turned out, the lightning DID hit in the horse area of the camp site. All the horses seemed to take it in stride, you should pardon the expression... but a few people got a little fried. Nothing fatal, but there were definately a few shake ups that night.

Anyway... I�m going to pause this here, cause It�s already rather long. *chuckles* As if that comes as a surprise to anyone here.

While I was out today, I wrote a song... sorta. I was sittin outside and just singin to myself, the way I used to more than a decade ago. And yes, this is something that I haven�t done for over a decade. But I was just out, making up songs as I went along... and I started writing down the words. These are they below. Just figured I�d share that. *chuckles*

Peace unto thy heart, mine dahlink.

I thought of this because of a friend who has just been told by the guy she�s in love with, that he wasn�t interested. Honey... I�m sorry you have to go through this pain. And I know that the pain seems to be all you have at the moment... but there�s more. Eventually... maybe not now, maybe not even soon, but eventually, the pain will fade. And it will fade a little more every day. Please, don�t allow this pain to completely shut you down. You�re better than that. You are of high value. Don�t let this hurdle end your career, so to speak.

My love to you, honey. I do care.

To be sung in a sort of pseudo-Irish-folk melody structure... it would sound appropriate sung by Jewel.