6 24 03

11a

Romans 14

Hmmm. This chapter is all about differences in worship styles. Rather, Paul is telling us that there are multiple different ways to worship God, to believe in Him, and one shouldn�t condemn someone else for their specific belief set.

This is far more difficult for me than it would seem. I put up a good front, you know. I can talk a lot about how everyone has the right to their own life and how others can do whatever they want to as long as they don�t mess with me and mine. But that�s not exactly true is it?

No, I get pissy when people do things I don�t think they should do.

We have this exact problem in our household currently. The example Paul uses most heavily is the difference between clean and unclean foods. For those of you who have only heard a little about this subject� don�t worry about it, I�m just going to blather on for a while.

Anyway, in our household, from the time I was virtually an infant, it was understood that we don�t eat �unclean� foods. We don�t consume pork, shellfish, some kinds of fish, certain types of fowl, etc. This was a really, really big deal in the Church as I was growing up. I didn�t think anything of it, hell, I was a kid and I had the kind of Mom who inflicted horrid foods on you anyway. (She made me eat liver more than once. And, Mom, I love you with my whole heart, but I will never eat meatloaf again *shudders*)

Anyway� So, for the first twenty years of my life, or so, I just didn�t consume pork or shellfish, it wasn�t even an option. Hell, it wasn�t until I was 20 that I realized I was allergic to pork. (The paternal parental unit had a butcher shop for a while and I wrapped the meat after he�d cut it. Usually he had beef to deal with, but once in a while he�d get a pig to butcher. When it came time to wrap the pork, my hands would tingle, then itch, then swell whenever I touched the stuff. Tactile allergy. I found out a few years later, when I tried sausage, that the allergy was total� pork comes up faster than it goes down.) *shudders*

Erm�. Back to the real point�

So, I�ve basically spent my whole life with the simple knowledge that you just don�t eat pork or shellfish etc. Mom still abides by that. Once we left the Church, now close to ten years ago, the paternal parental unit immediately started consuming massive amounts of pork and shellfish. When we heard that the Church had done away with the clean/unclean foods thing, the paternal parental unit took that as proof that he could eat whatever he wanted to. Mom still won�t eat unclean meats.

The problem is this� the maternal parental unit is offended when the paternal parental unit eats unclean foods. Instead of simply saying that she would prefer he not eat those specific foods in front of her, however (which, as we ALL know, wouldn�t accomplish jack shit), she does the melodramatic sigh-roll-your-eyes thing, then she gets ticked off.

So, to the maternal parental unit (and myself) vs 13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother�s way. So, Mom, knock it off. Let him eat whatever he wants to. He works his salvation out with God, not you. Don�t put your restrictions upon him.

If he wants to puncture a cow in the living room and suck the blood from its neck, just smile, nod your head and walk out of the house. (Of course, you then use HIS credit card number to pay to have the mess cleaned up.) When he piles his plate high with greasy sausages and pancakes with syrup and enough butter to stop a tank, just smile and look the other way. God will give you the respect you deserve. You�re married to God, not Dad. God is your provider and care taker and He will never let you down.

Now, to the paternal parental unit. Heh�

Dad, knock it the fuck off. There is one verse pertaining to Mom in this chapter. Yeah, she complains about your food intake when she shouldn�t, but come off it, when have you listened to what anyone else has to say about anything? Try never. Yes, Mom should stop complaining about your food and the way you eat it. It would be nice if she stopped complaining about the cayenne and tobasco too.

BUT, it is your responsibility, not only as a child of God and a spouse to a child of God, but as a human being in this world, to relinquish center stage once in a while. News flash here, the world does NOT revolve around you. Okay, so I�m getting pissed off because of my own irritations with you. But really, do you have ANY idea how tobasco stinks?

This is the point, oh father dear, vs 14b-15 �But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean. If your brother is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy your brother for whom Christ died. So, if your wife is distressed, offended, nauseated by your specific food choice, don�t eat those foods in her presence. You can�t possibly give me ANY excuse I would buy. You only see Mom two days out of the week, surely you could put yourself and your own comfort away that long�

The point is this, Dad. �� *shakes her head* Nevermind. I just had the scenario go through my head� Dad wouldn�t care. Even if Jesus Himself were sitting at the table with Dad and showed that tobasco bothered Him, Dad would continue to pile the stuff on. Dad is the epitome of narcissistic. It doesn�t matter what anyone else thinks or feels or wants or desires. His way or the highway. *shrugs*

Okay, Mom, new plan of attack� Love him anyway. Let him be a slob, a selfish, narcissistic pain in the behind� let him. You get YOUR reward from God. Like with Odie� it is your responsibility to feed him every day, pat him, love him and just write off his tendency to slobber as his being a dog. Then, you get the good stuff from God. Tell God that Dad�s eating offends you, but don�t mention it to dad again. Dad doesn�t care and he�s not going to change for anyone. Accept that and find a new way to deal with it.

*shrugs*

The real point of this chapter is to love one another. If wearing a midriff shirt offends someone, don�t wear it around them. IF you don�t know it offends them, it is their responsibility to let you wear the clothes you like and love you anyway. If you have a tongue ring, tattoos, multiple piercings, black hair and blue teeth or blue hair and black teeth, if you�re homeless, or rich� whatever, it doesn�t matter. The point is that we�re supposed to love one another. Don�t judge the person next to you cause you don�t know where they�ve been. You don�t know why they make the choices they do. You don�t need to know. You need only to accept them for who they are and let God sort out the rest of it.

So, don�t offend people if you can avoid it. Don�t get offended if you can avoid it.

Perfect example� I don�t like to be touched. I especially don�t like to be touched by strangers. I especially don�t like to be touched by males unless I�ve given them permission. The other day, while I was at Chuck�s, one of the male regulars walked in and poked his fingers against my sides, ya know, as if he were going to tickle me. This offends me. This more than offends me, it pisses me off. However, I did NOT deck him. I did not turn around and scream at him, telling him never to fucking touch me again. That would probably have been considered an over-reaction. *smiles sweetly*

I smiled faintly and continued my writing without saying a word. He went on doing his own thing. He didn�t mean offense. He didn�t mean to bother me. He didn�t mean to push my fight-or-flight button (and I don�t do the flight part � When it�s down to a fight-or-flight situation, I don�t run, I come out fighting. It takes a whole hell of a lot to get to that point, though) so I just let it go.

Don�t get me wrong here, there are plenty of times when I don�t let it go. As is clearly evidenced by my irritation with the paternal parental unit. But, that is a complaint for another time. Suffice it to say, be nice� to everyone.