===Sliding into my brain... Pull Me Under: Dream Theater -- Suggested by Charles (updated yesterday)===
===Sliding into my brain... Riveria Paradise: Stevie Ray Vaughan===

Mmmmm, so we come upon another day. And, this song ends just as I start typing the entry. isn't that quaint?

===Sliding into my brain... River Of Tears: Eric Clapton===

I hope all of you are doing well. It has been an interesting day for me. I've done almost nothing of merit. *chuckles* I have to set up Mom's printer tomorrow. I just, sorta, spaced all the stuff I was supposed to accomplish today. BUT, I did go to the Unemployment Office to pick up the forms. So, perhaps they'll be able to find me some job that will work for me. Dunno how they'd do it tho. *chuckles*

I made up another batch of salad dressing tonight. Mom has just fallen for it somethin aweful. *chuckles* It's so incredibly simple. I"m just cheating, you know. *smirks* The packet of seasoning, sour cream and a little milk. But, she loves it and I love my Mom.

*rolls her eyes at the sarcastic "ooh's' and "aahhh's" from the audience*

Cmon. I firmly believe in Dennis Miller's comment that he'd like to hear, some day, one of those talk shows where instead of the kid complaining about how his/her parents fucked them up, the kid says something like, "Hey, my Mom's great, My dad's great, I'm just a shit."

*laughs quietly*

I love my parents. But my problems don't stem from them. They stem from me. Much as I hate to, I do take responsibility for my own fuck ups. *chuckles* And you should love me because of that. I'm taking responsibility. Reward my efforts by sending all your friends and accquaintences to my diary. *winks*

In other news... And this is a really big deal... Charles updated his diary yesterday. Woohoo. I"m thrilled. Everyone should immediately stop reading this and go check out his entry. It's way, way, way cool. And leave a bunch of messages on his message board so that he knows how very much we all love him and such. Or something.

===Sliding into my brain... I Wish It Would Rain Down: Genesis===

Ask him questions. Make him think. Make him burn that brain power. *smirks, winking*

Sympatico updated yesterday too. After his harrowing surgery and the hell he went through to get his brother off to the airport and such... well... It was a nasty experience. And you should appease the Fatal Tiger and go tell the Knocked Up Marmoset exactly how wonderful and marvelous he is. Cause he is.

AND, as I've said many times. Tho he named the marmosets after he and I, You can be damn sure that the pregnant one is his. *laughs* The first male marmoset in history to be knocked up. It's hillarious. So go visit him. Just cause.

And, even more... Go visit

Check him out tho. For more than the recipes. I enjoy what he writes.

===Sliding into my brain... Kiss The Rain: Billie Meyers -- Suggested by Sympatico (updated yesterday as well)===

Check out TK too. And give him a cyber hug. That boy definately has been dealing with some fuckered up customers and supervisors. Send him a gentle word or simply link him so that a buncha people slip and slide all over his diary and then perhaps we'll find a way to drag the depressing customers out into the streets to hang them, one by one, by their toes. Or something.

While I"m plugging people... I must, must, must give out a few words of encouragement and love to someone I haven't talked about in far too long. He is one of the most incredible men I've yet met online. He is kind, tender and gentle when he needs to be. He is hard and aggressive when need calls for such. He has never failed to bring a smile to my lips and he updates almost as regularly as everyone who updates regularly. So, please, as soon as you have the time to spare, go talk to my favorite uncle and tell him that I miss him and I'm so happy for the way his life is going.

===Sliding into my brain... She Runs Away: Duncan Sheik===

So, now that I've gotten a few plugs under my proverbial belt I should probably get down to the meat of the entry, neh? Sure, sounds good to me. Except for one small problem. I have no idea what to write about today. I suppose I could regale you with stories of how I slaved my way from the post office to the pharmacy to LBT to the Unemployment Office and finally home. I could tell stories and histories of my life and friends. I could tell you about my scare this morning. Yeah, I think I'll do that.

*chuckles quietly* Alright, fair warning here. I am so very blatantly obviously running on tangents and such. Forgive the bizarrity of this entry. Of course, if you're still reading after all this time, then you've grown accustomed to the psycho-fied visions which traipse through these cyberfields. *rolls her eyes at herself*

===Sliding into my brain... Little Hands: Duncan Sheik===

By the by, I highly suggest that you folks DL some Duncan Sheik in the near future. Little Hands is my absolute favorite. Followed rather quickly by Wishful Thinking Also, I would like suggestions for some specific songs... AND, I want help finding a song I've got in mind.

First off, I would like suggestions on songs about or with "rain" in the title. Preferably fairly mellow songs. I'm making up a "rain" anothology so to speak. I don't mind the faster paced songs. In fact, I like a lot of them. But what I'm looking for is some bluesy, mellow stuff. I have the Genesis and Billie Meyers stuff. I also consider River of Tears in there cause it's about water/tears and it's bluesy. If you folks have suggestions, please, please, please let me know. I wanna hear em.

Secondly, I am looking for a song which is extremely obscure. Mom, if you're reading this entry, stop here. You're not allowed to know about this. Skip these next two paragraphs, please. I'm hoping to attain this song for you. So there. == Anyway, what I"m looking for is a song that my Mother heard about 20 years ago. She only heard it once and it was while she was driving through Yuba City, California. I don't know if I've spelled that correctly or not... forgive me if I didn't.

I don't know the name of it, I only know the chorus... Who's gonna run the truck stop in Yuba City
keep the back bar clean, keep the place lookin pretty
tell jokes to the folks, keep the conversation witty
when it gets right down, to the nubby nitty gritty
who's gonna run the truck stop in Yuba City when I'm gone

So, if you know of that song, or if you can point me to it at all, please, please, please, please (don't you love it when I beg) let me know how to get it. I've looked on Napster, but couldn't find it as I don't know the exact title, nor do I know the performer. Hell, I don't know if it's even a "song" anymore. It could have been something that was only played on a specific radio station way back when. But, I'm hoping. *smiles softly*

===Sliding into my brain... Wishful Thinking: Duncan Sheik===

Anyway, I was going to tell you about my scare this morning. I was downstairs after having watched The Sentinel, The Daily Show and Whose Line Is It Anyway when Mom comes in... An hour and a half before her lunch break. She talked about having numb hands, her vision was going funny and she was alternating with freezing chills and burning up tho she had no fever and no other symptoms of a cold or flu.

Now, Mom is diabetic, treating it with meds and diet. But still... what she described to me was the same thing that happened to Patricia Hampton before she slid into a diabetic coma. This flipped me out so bad. Here I am, sitting in the living room, looking at my mother and a picture flashes before my eyes of me standing, dressed in black, looking at her coffin as it's lowered into the ground.

I started crying right there. It so totally flipped me out.

===Sliding into my brain... You Still Move Me: Dan Seals===

I could barely breathe. I was looking at her and I got stern, telling her I wanted her to go to the hospital. She refused, saying that all she wanted was to sleep for a little while. Just to rest cause she thought she was just tired and might be coming down with the flu or something.

*shakes her head* Damn, the panic was rising in my chest. Kinda like it is now. I could feel that adrenaline just about to start pumping. I was terrified. I could see her taking a nap and never waking up. My Mom isn't old enough to die yet. Hell, my grandmother is only 80. Mom's not even 60 yet. There's no way she can die yet. No way at all.

But I was still flipped out. Terrified. I just saw that coffin being lowered into the ground. I told her that if she went in to take a nap, that I would be in there to wake her up in an hour to see if she was still conscious or if she'd slipped into that blasted coma. Coming face to face with death on such incredibly intimate terms. Perhaps flipped out doesn't quite cover the breadth of my fear/reaction.

===Sliding into my brain... Iris: Goo Goo Dolls===

I have no fear of my own death. None. Hell, I've faced death many times. Yeah, I've had near-death experiences. Passing out due to blood loss after slashing my wrists... nearly going over a cliff into the waters of Sunset Falls up at Mount Index in the Cascades... Head on with a Kenworth Semi... Yeah, I've faced death.

I'm not afraid of my own.

But you can damn sure bet I'm terrified of losing my Mother. And that picture of watching the coffin.... damn, that just so totally flipped me out. Sometimes I hate having such a visual imagination. It scares me. I don't want my Mom to die. She's.... my Mom. She's my best friend. She's my sole support down here.

She didn't die, obviously. Had she died, there would be no fucking way in hell that I would even dare contemplate writing a frickin diary entry. I'd be passed out in grief or trying to make funeral arrangements. Gah, I don't wanna talk about that anymore. No way. Out, ick. Not nice thoughts. NO!!!!!

She ate an orange, then laid down for an hour. She told me she didn't want me to wake her, cause she figured she was just low on sleep or something. *shakes her head* Demmit. That so pissed me off and freaked me out at the same time. But... she woke up of her own accord after an hour. I didn't have to wake her. I wouldn't have, cause she'd told me not to, but still. I was nervous about it.

*shrugs*

So, that was my scare from this morning.

===Sliding into my brain... Silicone: Mono===

Currently, there's someone trying to call the house. They're letting the phone ring, like, forever. I'm not answering. *rolls her eyes* I have to go set up the answering machine anyway. I'll go check on it then.

So, Joey needs to go out and I need to use the facilities as well.

I'll talk to you some more later. Peace unto thy hearts, my dearest darlings. Or something.