So, what all did you folks do tonight? I bet you did practical things, like studying, or re-arrainging your livingrooms, or making love to your spouses. *sighs*

I, unfortunately, was attempting to tame the vastly evil and corrupt Bonzi Buddy. *rolls her eyes* This is a vile creation, worse than all computer viruses ever discovered by comperds (computer nerds for the uninitiated). It is more disgusting, vile and corrupt than any mob family in existance. It is worse, even, than Barney!!!

Bonzi Buddy is program you can DL onto your computer which will "assist" and "entertain" you. It will "find" the information you want and it will even "read" your email for you. It talks to you and is, for the most part, interactive. However, Bonzi Buddy is ......... and these are very, very bad things, folks........ small, confusing and, primarily, purple.

This is an evil which must be stopped. My Mother, and I so pitty her, DLed the initial software for Bonzi Buddy. Or rather, she tried to. But, it kept going and going and going, taking forever and a day. This purple gorilla has access to my Mother's computer. And that damned beast probably understands her comp better than she ever will.

Regardless... I hate this damned thing. Not only does this asshole program become animate and vocal at odd times of the day and night, but it also points mom to strange DLs. AND, for convenience that damned purple gorilla will handle all mom's DLs and such. Not a good idea.

Hell, Mom got a program DLed last night that she knows nothing about, and wasn't even there for the DL of. She was in the other room and the farggin Barney wanna-be decided she needed this program. Also, the whole Bonzi Buddy program, modus operandi is to draw people in, take control of their computers, DL all sorts of try-it-then-buy-it software. Currently Mom's got two different programs she never wanted, but which are going to cost her upwards of 50.00 bucks a month. Isn't that a little... um... subversive?

So, My whole responsibility was to get this program that she liked, (a voice email program, it will read her Email for her... out loud) to work properly. The pop server had to be entered correctly. Actually, I finally found the problem. She had entered her full name instead of the actual username. So, once that was entered, it was fine... BUT, it took me an hour to figure out that that was the problem.

And this is why...

Bonzi Buddy did NOT have clear or direct instructions. Their help menu was a farce and a half and every third screen, in my hunt for information, was an advertisement "Just click the link and We'll download yet another wonderful product" Of course, they're words were more... subtle. More subversive. I swear. Bonzi Buddy is out there to conquer the electronic citizens because Barney has already conquered the children among the non-electronic citizens.

Seriously, think about this... They're both purple. AND, tonight, as I was listening to my mother interact with this damned purple gorilla, it actually sang part of the Banrey Theme song. People, come on... There has got to be some law against this. They're using those Orbital Mind Control Lazers (TM) or some such.

This is a dangerous circumstance.

Stay the hell away from Bonzi Buddy. It will take control of your computer. It will DL expensive software that you have to pay for or remove from your hard drive immediately. Which is bad if you're a person like my Mother who doesn't really know how to delete anything from anywhere on the computer.

This is really a bad, bad, bad thing. Bonzi Buddy. A damned purple gorilla, out there to conquer the world. Out there to do your internet surfing for you, your internet shopping for you, your internet everything for you. It's bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad. Stay away from Bonzi Buddy.

Anyway, I know that this entry has been short, but I have been fighting off the lazers from this vile and evil program... I already feel myself growing tired. My strength is ebbing. I don't want a cigarette, but I want to say I want one. Just cause that is what fits there.

However, what do I really want? *laughs brightly, then slightly maniacally* JELLY BELLYS.

Love and all to you and yours, dear hearts.

*waves and stuff*