You know, I wrote up that entry (the one posted at almost midnight) and then went down to talk to Mom for a little while. The short conversation which I intended, turned into a two and a half hour conversation.

The end of said conversation was the realization of what sends me into a depression. Mom was asking me what sent me into such deep, life ending depression. How could I have gotten so damned depressed... what would have helped... how had I gotten that far.

I thought about it and thought about it, coming up with no reply.

After another 45 minutes or so of picking apart the few things I can remember about those periods of depression, I discovered what it was...

Rejection.